From the February 8, 2017, Pickles comic strip.
1. Earl is sitting on a park bench with his friend and says: "Today's the kind of day when I feel like just hopping on my Harley and take off."
2. Then he continues: "If my wife would let me."
3. "And I had a Harley."
4. "And my hemorrhoids weren't killing me."
Not me. I'm going out on my Harlet right now. April You-Know-What.
Well, With Me, As Much As I'd Love to Go Out On a Motorcycle, I'm Too Scared of Them to Do It. --RoadDog